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Searching for relationship advice?
"From Where I Sit" is frank talk from a relationship expert with a powerful POV.

Once a womanizer of considerable renommé, handsome and dapper Frank Borsellino aka The Cruise Director (TCD), (having earned his license to pilot a wheelchair), is happiest when surrounded by beautiful, women who are both intelligent and sexy, women of strong and independent spirit.

A romantic at heart, TCD favours culinary delights and a good bottle of wine. A warrior for love, warmth, beauty, joy, peace, and good times. A great cigar and probing dialogue are what stimulate his senses these days.

TCD is a trusted friend to numbers of very desirable women who confide in him, because they crave feedback and advice from a man who knows and values a woman's wants, and unsatisfied needs.

To The Cruise Director @ Stylesense,

The man I love is emotionally blocked. He is ex-military and is practiced at hiding his emotions. I would go so far as to say he is terrified of intimacy.

I am intensely drawn to him and he to me. We spend joyful, light-hearted hours together, but in between these interludes, I feel empty, sad and lonely.

I believe I am powerless to end this relationship. What can I do to get him to open up?


Distraught in Detroit


Dear Distraught,

A man's emotions can tip like a scale in either direction.

Here are few tactics you might want to consider to get him to drop his guard and open up:

1. If he was traumatized by some incident either as a soldier or in his childhood you need to reassure him and help him to heal. Take him in your arms, hold him, stroke him, and tell him repeatedly that you and he are emotionally stronger together than apart.

2. Step back for awhile and see if he comes to you. Let him feel you are unsure of his intentions. Be clear and precise and explain what your needs are and tell him how they need to be met.

Either scenario will help you to guage his reaction and will make clear the effort and true commitment he is willing to put into your relationship. Then you must determine how much are you willing to work and to compromise. As a pre-caution, you may want to be on the look out for a man who will better meet your emotional requirements.

Remember 'There are men here and there to whom the whole of life is like an after-dinner hour with a cigar; easy, pleasant, empty, perhaps enlivened by some fable of strife to be forgotten before the end is told.'
~ Joseph Conrad

Frank Borsellino
aka The Cruise Director (TCD)